random no1

Hi :)

Today I’ve watched The Pursuit of Happyness, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, and the episode of Hello Counselor where byut’s boys were on for Time era.

Am I a fan of Beast? maybe yep maybe not. I actually have Time and Goodluck with me now.

At one phase, to be more precise, at my first experience of earning. Beast’s songs were my everyday jam. Good Luck in the mornings, History in the midnights.

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My work shift was a whole month long during Ramadhan and the restaurant clearly would operate after Maghrib onwards. Yeah I lost what any Muslim would treasure.

Though it was brief to see now, the days felt.. really long.

I’d start working at noon, hours before operating hour starts and get home hours after operating hour ends. I would wake up in the mornings regretting how I simply agreed to work there and thinking of how wonderful had it been if it was just a simple break before my freshman year starts. 

But then I had my elder sister working there too. She who had it clearly much harder than me, working her official job during office hours and working off remaining hours at the restaurant. Every night after work, I would go all ear as she nags everything away while driving her last exhausting period of the day. We had enough hands at the restaurant and she planned to quit but that was only for a few while. Weeks pass and we went short of hands, both my employers + big sis + a male colleague + me were the only ones working.

For two months, I was silently watching how my thoughts were going. Points of view widen, lessons from every direction I look. Physically I was drained, but I was able to control how my mental strength were going. It was exhilarating that I was earning both internally and externally at one point of my life. 

The nagging part from my sis every night somehow didn’t get to me that much because I vowed to myself to try positivity that phase around. Before when someone nags about things to me a lot, I start to grow the complaining bone. The vow was something I made to have myself proud at myself if I was able to keep it well.

But Mom being upset, that shook me great. Mom was kinda hurt over the phase. Some days I would find her getting frustrated at how I don’t wake up as early as I should to complete the chores she barely afford to complete those days. At one point I took every negative words I had over the day and cry over one customer. He was not to be blamed, I’m sorry sir. But I guess being a mother, Mom forgives easily. One Eid morning she started to brag to aunts how I handled a house full of brother’s guests calmly. Which makes me finally wonder what more of the little things I could do to make her happy. 

All is well, the long days eventually got short. In the latter I got a new colleague which was a primary school friend. We both quit some weeks before start of my first year in uni, me few days earlier than her.

Oh, about how I had Beast’s Good Luck era all along.

These boys, my close friends may remember how I used to not like them when they had their Beautiful and Fiction days. At the time I was just being the weird me, not liking what everyone else would like. Don’t worry Beast I don’t hate you anymore lol.

(*a message to my 15 year old* GOOD GRACIOUS WHY WERE YOU so boring and weirdly serious?)

Okay being me again, some weeks into the beginning of the holiday, weeks before I started the part time thing(where I don’t get to do my weird habits that much), I was watching Happy Together.

Yeah if you ask my family they’re sick of watching me watching KBS. *whispers*they hardly know the joy I find when I watch Happy Together, Hello Counselor, Immortal Songs, Return of Superman compare to the local getting-boring-each-day shows.

Ah, the Happy Together episode that day had Seob and Kwangie. The topic, as always, the hard times the guests had.  Seob was sharing away his trainee days, how he used to be Kwang’s backup dancer along with the other Beast members.

That’s how I started tracking back Beast. Forget Arashi. Beast’s Showtime, I started catching up at the second episode. Then the Good Luck release.

When I started the part time thingy, Good Luck era was going on. I would catch up on their stages during the midnights after work or in the afternoons before work or on any off days I had. I made sure I watch their stages.

Reason?

1.       Good Luck = good luck to me to survive the day.

2.       Beast’s long trainee days, or in my dictionary, my treasure.

I don’t know if I should find these boys as inspiring as this much, but if there was anything I could hold on to at the time to keep my healing/positivity holding up, Beast fits that place well.

I didn’t buy Good Luck at that time tho, it felt weird to have them posted to home haha so I bought it these days and had it delivered to hostel.

 Cube, know that these boys two version-ed album has their sentimental value to me. Take care of their music well. 

Goodnight. :)